NPR : News

Filed Under:

Sandwich Monday: The Egg Rollie

Ever since Neanderthal man first cooked mammoth eggs over a fire, we've been looking for newer and better ways to cook eggs. Finally, the Egg Rollie is here. Take a second to watch the video above, then recoil in horror, then read our review.

Ian: "EGG-cellent!" I love the way it "EGG-scretes" the eggs!

Miles: Say what you will, this is significantly more successful than the time I tried to make an omelet in my toaster.

Eva: You should see the chicken this came out of.

It is really amazing to watch it work. You drop in a couple eggs, and about seven minutes later, they rise, all on their own, like an egg snake, obeying the flute of its egg snake charmer.

Ian: Or missile silos for World War Egg.

Miles: We really should've known something was up when every recipe in the cookbook started, "Cook eggs in something other than the Rollie."

Robert: Oh, look what it says on the box: "Winner of the Most Likely To Maintain Its Shape Through Your Entire Digestive Tract Award."

Robert: It's not the kind of deviled egg I'm used to, but at least it really does come from Satan.

Eva: Now I know what to eat with my tube toast every morning.

Ian: I'm excited to cut this up with a Ginsu knife, then wash it down with my Ron Popeil juicer, then clean up the mess with my Shamwow, then dry my tears on my Slanket.

Miles: "As Can't Be Unseen on TV!"

Blythe: Is it OK that I'm using it as a shake weight?

[The verdict: pretty disgusting. There's just something about watching what you're about to eat move on its own that really knocks the appetite right out of you.]

Sandwich Monday is a satirical feature from the humorists at Wait Wait ... Don't Tell Me.

Copyright 2013 NPR. To see more, visit http://www.npr.org/.

NPR

Jack Davis, Cartoonist Who Helped Found 'Mad' Magazine, Dies

Money from a job illustrating a Coca-Cola training manual became a springboard for Jack Davis to move from Georgia to New York.
NPR

Cookie Dough Blues: How E. Coli Is Sneaking Into Our Forbidden Snack

Most people know not to eat raw cookie dough. But now it's serious: 46 people have now been sickened with E. coli-tainted flour. Here's how contamination might be occurring.
NPR

At The Democratic Convention, Choreographing A Sea Of Signs

Watch even a few minutes and you're bound to see some synchronized sign-holding — brightly colored placards with slogans like "Stronger Together" waving in the crowd.
NPR

Writing Data Onto Single Atoms, Scientists Store The Longest Text Yet

With atomic memory technology, little patterns of atoms can be arranged to represent English characters, fitting the content of more than a billion books onto the surface of a stamp.

Leave a Comment

Help keep the conversation civil. Please refer to our Terms of Use and Code of Conduct before posting your comments.