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10 Clues That The Zombie Outbreak Being Announced On Your Television Is Not A Hoax

As reported on Tuesday's Morning Edition, KRTV in Great Falls, Mont., was apparently the victim of hackers who broke in and broadcast a warning of attacking zombies. The station now says that it was a hoax, fortunately.

But in the future, how can a viewer at home identify a similar alert that really requires immediate action to avoid a very real zombie horde? We have gathered 10 possible signs that the next zombie warning that beeps across your television is all too real.

1. You turn on Fox at 8 on a Wednesday night and hear Ryan Seacrest say, "THIS! Is MRRRRRRNNGGGRRRRNNNGGG."

2. Local news running reports of people cleaning grocery stores out of bread, milk, eggs, and cadaver repellant.

3. At Starbucks, barista holds up a paper cup, reads what's written on it, and says, "Soy latte for 'GAAAAAH'? Soy latte? 'GAAAAAAH'?"

4. Local Yelp reviews consistently knocking off two stars for "oversalted frontal lobe."

5. Slack-faced neighbor doesn't respond to your friendly morning greeting; wanders down middle of street with arms extended, despite meticulously maintained sidewalk.

6. Your cable guide suddenly lists The Walking Dead as "a whimsical documentary."

7. "#zombiezombiezombiesendhelp" starts trending.

8. Reports from New York Fashion Week describe surprising uptick in "tattered dirty pants stained with cerebrospinal fluid for spring."

9. Three colleagues report seeing different "Thriller video flashmobs" on the way to work.

10. Charity event mysteriously rebranded "5K Fun Slump."

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Auction Of Artifacts In Paris Stirs Protest At American Indian Museum In D.C.

"It's almost like seeing one of our own tribal members being auctioned off," says a member of California's Hoopa tribe who denounced the auction during an event at the National Museum of the American Indian.

NPR

We Don't Know How Many Workers Are Injured At Slaughterhouses. Here's Why

Injuries in the meat industry are likely to be under-reported, a new GAO report finds. Workers may be sent back to the line without seeing a doctor, or may not report out of fear of losing their jobs.
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U.S. House Rejects D.C.'s Plans For Full Autonomy Over Budget

In a 240-179 vote, the Republican-led House passed a bill that would overturn efforts by the city to take control over how it spends its money. It's a largely symbolic move: The Senate and President Obama are unlikely to go along.

NPR

Reports Peg Tech Billionaire As Funder Of Hulk Hogan's Case Against Gawker

Silicon Valley entrepreneur Peter Thiel is said to be bankrolling the ex-wrestler's lawsuit. Gawker is appealing a jury verdict that awarded Hogan $140 million over the 2012 publication of a sex tape.

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